Yes, it's true, this was a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong week. Even though I built in extra days and stretched out all the hours, and even increased page length for some of my client's stuff and then compressed it all again, so that they could have it all in three milliseconds tops (!!!!!), I somehow did not have any hours in the day left for sleep! I was on the average zzzzzzzzzoning for way less than 6 a night, and we all know that sleep-deprivation can make your brain explode, and I should know this, right?!?!?
So … Last night, as Mark would say, I "shut 'er down!" instead of continuing to, as he would also say, “get ‘er done!” I was in bed and asleep by 11pm ... my goal was 9pm but Mark was watching (trying not to fall asleep during) Travolta and DenzelW in the remake of "The Taking of Pelham 123" and the banter and dialogue in that movie was fab-you-lust ... or worth lusting after, so I finished watching it with him, plus poking him to keep him awake... and then we went to bed!
I got good, solid LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG sleep.
Y' all saw the part where I dreamt that Mark, IN MY DREAMS and lying right next to me had the absolute hairy-assed nerve to make out with someone from our old high school, someone with really big boobs (only in the present tense ... in the bed right next to me no less, while I am sleeping and not even realizing that I'm dreaming about it until I wake up really mad him for some reason!) ... and this someone who shall remain nameless in case she would ever facebook add me, might be a little teeny bit surprised, with all her big boobs and all, why I slap her in the face at our high school reunion next year.
I mean, really seriously, Ms. Big-Boobed-You-Shall-Remain-Nameless, we graduated in '80 and Mark by then was already a grown man/child in the Navy, and if I didn't even know he existed in high school, even though we both went to school with his brother ... what right do you have coming into my sweet dreams and making out with my "old man from the sea" while I'm sleeping! You didn’t know anything about him either, and there you were RIGHT IN MY DREAM! Bitch!
Yeah, still kind of pissed, but I'm working through it.
Also in the dream, I was riding, cruising, and absolutely dream-screaming down country roads and bi-ways on my bike, and at the same time took some fan-ass-tab-u-lust (or to lust after) pictures of some giant black bears with grinning teeth who were chasing after me, but I was brave enough to stop on the downside of every glacier-y hill to get their photos with my phone when they crested the hills behind me, and stopped of course to take a breath and get their picture taken. (whatever, it’s my dream, bears can do that!)
Giant moose were also crossing my bike path, but I didn't get pictures of them. Damn it! This was my dream, and for once I wasn't clumsy and I was biking and taking pictures AT THE SAME TIME (pictures of things behind me, no less) while giant menacing bears were chasing me, and I managed not to even hit the moose! Mooses, the several moose and moose-ettes!?!??!? Math *is* heard, but everyday English … sheeeeeeeeesh!
Anyhoo … This is what I call a good night's sleep, because I dreamt, and when I woke up I even remembered the dream, and was peppy and well-rested enough to really be mad at Mark for kissing Big GaZonga Girl.
The rule on dreams is ... it's not what the symbols, objects or whatever meant, but it's all about how you "felt" when you woke up, and remembered the dream.
Well, like I said, I tore Mark's head off for kissing Nameless Girl, and made a mental note to blacken Nameless girl's adult woman eye next year at a social event.
But mostly, I was really F'ING fan-tab-u-lust (or to lust after) happy! HAPPY, I say.
Okay, one more time ... HAPPY!
If you are into analyzing dreams, I know that certain things showed up because they were on my subconscious tongued tip list when I fell asleep, and during this busy week, I know how they all got there too.
The Bears/Moose: Facebook-related, Wyoming-related, putting pictures up related, where there are some of me and favorite ex husband (1st husband) camping at the top of the Big Horns (’82-ish, no kids yet). We were the only ones in our wilderness arena. No other campers! A moose walked through our camp site, right past me at the fire when I was sizzling dinner. Male moose with rack! This somehow spun out in my brain that if we were the only ones atop the mountain that night, and the animals were that brave, that I'd certainly be eaten by a bear, so I slept in the truck with a pistol and Chris slept in the tent because he was not acting like a freaky scared dork. And I'm the one who wanted to come to Wyoming in the first place (huge back story), was lucky to have arrived alive, thrived and live there, and was the one who was ultra-excited about our camping trip that summer … but I suddenly tripped out over bears .. quit laughing ... I'm still trying to find the photo where, Chris is in a blow-up raft fishing in a serene water scene, and I took the picture from way up above on a ridge, where I still sat with his dad's pistol in my lap, but at a vantage point where I could shoot bears if they came after me or lumbered into the water to kill my husband! [okay, so maybe my brain damage, paranoia and other stuff was always there, even before the stroke ... but the neuro guys are still at the roundtable discussing all this]
The girl from high school ... has everything to do with SCOLIOSIS which I have and which I've been discussing with my exercise/fitness trainer this week. Anyone from my high school that is already on my facebook page, might know now who was kissing Mark in my dream, if they really think back on it, because there was only one girl in our high school who wore a scoliosis brace. My S-curved spine thankfully is milder (although still painful) case than that, but I also was born with a giant stick up my ass, so that my be why I never wore the brace.
Biking ... also discussed at the gym this week, because I HEART it!
Photos ... I take them all the time, enough said.
Clutziness ... that's me in general, and was implied in the dream by the fact that it did not exist in the dream.
THE END … sort of.
THE COLLAGE, like the dream, all about sleep and the messages within relate to the peeps I love and my puppy and is comprised of items I picked up, here and there in the house this morning, pinned to a piece of cork, scanned, and then put the items away. The Saturday clean sweep while walking around with a cup of coffee missing my new personal assistant and housekeeper (and yes she gets paid), Carol.The items regarding the end of my long week, sleep and my favorite puppy and peeps are as follows:
WALTER: One of his two boy pigtail boys that he had on his head when Mark picked him up at the groomer yesterday. Mark took them off, of course, and then to get back at me kissed Name Not Mentioned girl in my dreams, hello!?!?!?!?! There are not two bows in the picture because Mark crammed the other one up my ass and told me to stop putting purple sweaters in the dishwasher (hole other counseling appointment coming up on the calendar now, I’m not kidding!)
BEKAH: The striped moon is a piece of something from her wedding. I miss her. Kyle is sort of a part of that too, but while I tag him in this note, I would never ever tell him that I think that highly of him because he’s a brat!
CAROL: The purple ribbon, is all about her first child support and placement hearing last month, and then another appointment she had right after it, while I was in the car reading with Lili, where someone gave Carol a handful of "purple ribbon[s]" and stick pins, because it was for domestic abuse (mental, physical, sexual and otherwise) recognition. Carol came back to the truck with them and said "How ironic is that, after this morning in court, huh?" And how ironic is this? Carol had a horrifically long week, this week too, and when I came across this ribbon on my dresser this morning, I smiled because by Friday she was flying high again, and sleeping on new sheets! (long story, as are all of mine of late … but her story to tell, but the story is showing!)
ALICE: The button at the bottom with the energetic womanly figure on it. We got it at her "dad's work" last summer the excruciating time "gerald" met her dad. (ali is laughing her ass off right now reading this). And Ali is at her dad’s this weekend, and that’s where she’s laughing about this, and it’s good because we all love her laugh!
SARA ... the button with the owl made from a bottle cap. Because I think of you often and love you to death! You think I mentor you, but this year, especially the last month, and artsy-fartsy and word-wise, watching you thrive has renewed my own motivation and lust for such!
THE LITTLE GIRLS: The "pretty pretty 'sing" multi-natural stone bracelet on the edge, because everyone knows if you are a little girl and you have a really great grandma (which I did too), you love her and all of her pretty pretty 'sings! It's a given and the ongoing gift of womanhood in our family. And it’s all for Ru, Rae and the little Bug!
MARK: The bling bracelet, from last Christmas, wore it several times in the last several weeks, needed to put it back in its box and note it again in my heart. Plus the mental note that for years and years and years, I’ve always deserved really nice things, kindness and regard, and it’s even okay to ask for them up front. Mark is my reminder of that, which is why he probably gets away with kissing other girls in my dreams, sometimes.
THE ROOSTER ... because we collect them, Mark and I, and because it's all dark and purple’d and torn from an Ambien ad (which I did not have to tweak that kind of med for my own sleep train ... woot!) and because Roosters also remind of Scarlet Rae when she asked, "Grandma ... so why do you and Grandpa Mark have all these birds, and the roosters, because …………… it might be kind of creepy!" (We have roosters made out of almost everything you can think of save our own shit, so you can see why she might be kind of freaked out!)
Creepy and Happy are "almost rhymes" ... THE END
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