Take the Giant Leap

I honestly didn't think I'd stick with this, but when I came down to my desk this morning my brain was all like oh that's right, I've got to do my daily collage, OR.I.WILL.DIE!

So that part felt good, the part where I stopped myself from dying inside.

And this is what I came up with, a little ditty about shoes, and dancing and taking that giant ass leap!

It's done on a bar coaster. And of course there is meaning behind that ... (oh shit, I think I'm giving birth to a fat-ass blog post) ...

Four plus years ago I moved from a small community in Wisconsin to an even smaller community in Wisconsin. I had been in the previous community for something like 13 years, even though when I left Wisconsin in 1980, I SWORE I WOULD NOT BE BACK!

But life has a way of making you double-back, whether you want to or not.

So ... when I moved from the previous smaller community to the community I live in now (which they call "the village of" because it's that small), this was also the community where I went to school from the 4th grade on through graduation.

Holy shit, Batman!

I know you think it's probably not even possible, but while I went to school in this "the village of," I actually lived further out in the back country in "an unincorporated" land. Unincorporated lands are much, much smaller than the nearest "the village of," and so ... Blah, blah, blah.

Anyways ... when I moved to this "the village of" I was making some serious life changes, and when I got to the village (even though it was just one town over) I said to myself, "I should make some friends." (I hadn't really done that in the 13 years that I lived just one town over, other than if it was school or kid-related, so nothing really, really deep ... I just wouldn't f'ing allow it!)

Then I threw up in my mouth a little, with fear and loathing and the idea of "making an effort to make friends." Ewwwwwwwww, ick, I'd rather die!

Then I thought about how you read articles about "making friends" and it tells you to join a club, go to church, attend this or that professional group, take a class ... um, so I did what anyone would do, I walked to the nearest pub ("villages of" have a lot of them!!!!!), and ordered a sandwich and a beer.

Then I stole the bar coaster I was using.

And then, instead of going to band camp, I spent THE ENTIRE SUMMER IN THAT BAR, I AM NOT KIDDING YOU!

I was not working, taking a "why don't I go mental over my health" break, was alone for the summer, and I certainly did meet my (don't make me puke!!!!) goal of meeting a lot of people, and I made some friends.

And I became fairly well known for swiping clean, new bar coasters, which did not keep me from getting into a good college in the fall just to bend my mind a bit further.

But don't even begin to ask me why I suddenly became a bar-coaster-stealing-whore for-bar-coasters hussy of a hoarding coasters whore! (for the coasters! i'm serious, that's all i ever took home from the bar!)

I can't explain it!

Unless ... have you ever really looked at the things?!!?!

The vendors come by ALL THE TIME and drop new ones off, and they are all very cool and artistic and sometimes stupid, but anyways in all different shapes, and pretty soon I had a whole drawer full of them to use at home when I entertained ... and (drum roll please) I HAD MADE SOME FRIENDS!

End of bar coaster story. (and i totally left out the part where I grew very weary, very fast of "beer on tap," spent part of the summer drinking Jack and gradually found Tanqueray ... died and went to heaven, THE END!!!!! of yet another new beginning!)

On to the collage ... it's done on a fairly new coaster for Hacker-Pschorr, the "brewers of real Oktoberfest bier," don't you know.

The poem "New Shoes" is from a vintage book Let's-Read-Together! Poems.

The remaining words and images are ripped from the 2005 issue of W magazine. I love this magazine for it's paper texture and rip-ability, and have since 2005 when I started collaging and altering with a passion and ordered a year's subscription just to have 12 issues to rip apart!

And that, folks, is the living end of my very weird of saying, going to a bar, stealing coasters and finding your signature drink, is a REALLY, REALLY GREAT WAY TO MEET FRIENDS.

And, so far, I see why I had to come back to this "the village of," but that's probably a whole other blog or a freak-ass altered collage, or sumpin!

Or ... I might just go back to bed for the rest of the week. One never knows!